Notices by delores (delores@shitposter.club), page 4
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delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Wednesday, 13-Sep-2017 05:41:17 UTC 
delores
all of mastodons problems are on other mastodon instances, but we take the blame. odd -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Tuesday, 12-Sep-2017 23:12:24 UTC
delores
@dolus NEVER SAFE FROM CO-OPTING -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Wednesday, 06-Sep-2017 02:03:06 UTC
delores
Please don't repeat my posts if you have followers on instances I block. That is block bypassing. You will be blocked as well. -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Tuesday, 05-Sep-2017 00:02:34 UTC
delores
https://github.com/tootsuite/mastodon/issues/4755
Pick A Gender Neutral Language Then You Dipshit Fuckwrangler -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Monday, 04-Sep-2017 23:26:36 UTC
delores
@hakui
gargron: I will be what Zuckerberg aspires to be but cannot create for himself, soon, when my botnet system is complete and able to be integrated with hackernews. I will burn like the brightest star...
me pressing fork button: ur gonna burn alright -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Monday, 04-Sep-2017 23:08:30 UTC
delores
@bob he wants mastodon to be a singular entity under a brand name and any instance running to be like a reddit subreddit. ultimately he still runs it. -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Monday, 04-Sep-2017 22:30:53 UTC
delores
gargron wants centralized where people can host their own groups. this is becoming more and more clear every day. -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Monday, 04-Sep-2017 22:15:32 UTC
delores
Use my shitty software or you're a nazi. Now. -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Sunday, 03-Sep-2017 22:02:05 UTC
delores
@hakui @bitterandrew everything revolves around me. so a banana? in a tree? holy shit. thats gotta be because i'm black. im so important people literally probably want to kill me. this is a death threat. -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Sunday, 03-Sep-2017 19:28:20 UTC
delores
maybe we would include pleroma development if the pleroma developer would contact us
*lain is blocked by gargron* -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Saturday, 02-Sep-2017 22:57:51 UTC
delores
@mattskala no it makes sense to me for like, nsfw or spoilers or trigger warnings. but "i'm talking about politics in this post" isn't a content warning if you do it ALL THE TIME -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Saturday, 02-Sep-2017 22:22:15 UTC
delores
mastodon wants images to work separately from content warnings because now they use content warnings as bold text to show "you have to click this, its important"
maybe if you kept it on stuff that people dont want to see instead of a meme, you wouldn't have to add useless features -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Saturday, 02-Sep-2017 04:47:46 UTC
delores
*me walks into antifa protest holding kekistan flag*
sage goes in all fields
*everybody SWOONS* -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Thursday, 31-Aug-2017 07:13:27 UTC
delores
INT. CONFERENCE ROOM, FEDIVERSE UNITED - DAY
Lain enters, carrying the NewsStream times under his arm. He is handsome, supremely confident and self-satisfied; he sees himself as a leader among men.
LAIN (to DELORES): Hello, noyou. Nice tie. How the hell are you?
DELORES: I've been great. And you?
(Their conversation fades down as we hear Delores' thoughts.)
DELORES (V.O.): Lain has mistaken me for this dickhead noyoushutthefuckupdad. It seems logical because Noyou also works at SPC and in fact does the same exact thing I do and he also has a penchant for B&W avatars and attending movie night. Noyou and I even go to the same barber, although I have a slightly better haircut.
During this voiceover the CAMERA WANDERS over to NOYOUSHUTTHEFUCKUPDAD, who is conferring with a colleague in the opposite corner of the room. He bears a superficial resemblance to DELORES.
LAIN: How's the Niu account going, Noyou?
DELORES (nervous): It's...it's...all right.
LAIN: Really? That's interesting.
He stares at DELORES, smiling
LAIN: Not great?
DELORES: Oh well, you know.
LAIN: And how's Hakui? She's a great girl.
DELORES: Oh yes. I'm very lucky.
HJ and SHP enter.
HJ: Hey. Lain! Congratulations on the Pawoo account.
LAIN: Thank you, eal.
SHP: Listen, Lain. Cofe?
LAIN: Call me. (Hands him a profile card)
SHP: How about Fridey?
LAIN: No can do. Got a res at eight-thirty at SunshineGardens. Great qts.
There is a stunned silence as he walks away and sits in a corner of the room, ostentatiously studying papers.
CLOSE-UP on DELORES's face, cold with hatred.
SHP (whispering): Jesus. SunshineGardens? On a Fridey nite? How'd he swing that?
HJ (whispering): I think he's lying.
DELORES takes out his wallet and pulls out a card.
SHP (suddenly enthused): Is that a 1cc?
DELORES: New profile card. What do you think?
HJ lifts it up and examines the lettering carefully.
HJ: Whoa. Very nice. Look at that.
He hands it to AUGUSTUS.
DELORES: Designed them yesterday.
AUGUSTUS: Good coloring.
DELORES: That's #333333. And the lettering is something called Helvetica Neue.
AUGUSTUS: It is very cool, Delores. But that's nothing.
He pulls a card out of his wallet and slaps it on the table.
AUGUSTUS: Look at this.
They all lean forward to inspect it.
SHP: That is really nice.
DELORES clenches his fists beneath the table, trying to control his anxiety.
AUGUSTUS: #000000 with Sans Serif type.
(Turning to DELORES)
AUGUSTUS: What do you think?
DELORES (barely able to breathe, his voice a croak): Nice.
SHP (holding the card up to the light): Jesus. This is really super. How'd a nitwit like you get so tasteful?
DELORES stares at his own card and then enviously at AUGUSTUS'.
DELORES (V.O.): I can't believe that Shp prefers Augustus' card to mine.
SHP: But wait. You ain't seen nothin' yet.
He holds up his own card.
SHP: Raised lettering, #0084B4...
DELORES (choking with anxiety): Impressive. Very nice. Let's see Lain's card.
SHP pulls a card from an inside coat pocket and holds it up for their inspection: "LAIN IWAKURA, FEDIVERSE UNITED, MERGERS AND ACQUISITIONS." DELORES swallows, speechless. The sound in the room dies down and all we hear is a faint heartbeat as DELORES stares at the magnificent card.
DELORES (V.O.): Look at that subtle off-black coloring. The tasteful thickness of it. Oh my God, it even has a watermark...
His hand shaking, DELORES lifts up the card and stares at it
until it fills the screen. He lets it fall. The sound returns to normal.
Bricky: Is something wrong? Delores... you're sweating. -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Thursday, 31-Aug-2017 03:15:26 UTC
delores
@augustus https://shitposter.club/attachment/968401 -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Wednesday, 30-Aug-2017 22:00:15 UTC
delores
normies legit step off my turf. you already took memes, you can't have shitposting. go back to posting "toots" or whatever the fuck -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Wednesday, 30-Aug-2017 21:58:13 UTC
delores
mastodon being good at shitposting is like saying my mother is good at facebook. she never stood a chance. -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Wednesday, 30-Aug-2017 11:33:49 UTC
delores
@lain oh jeez i dont know obama i kind of just wanna go back on the lolita express
biden i turned myself into a DRONE!!! -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Wednesday, 30-Aug-2017 11:29:11 UTC
delores
@lain BIDEN WE GOTTA KILL TRUMP DEMOCRACY ISNT REAL BIDEN BURURUR[P TIME TRAVEL OBAMA AND BIDEEEEN -
delores (delores@shitposter.club)'s status on Monday, 28-Aug-2017 20:32:02 UTC
delores
i am mentally unable to process politics unless you relate it to the protags/antags in a famous TV/movie adaption of a fiction series i don't read
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